Funny Jokes and Riddles

Funny jokes and riddles

1. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?

2. How do you get a blonde to marry you?

3. Why didn’t the chicken cross the road?

4. If you drop a yellow hat in the Red Sea what does it become?

5. How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

6. What is the question you can ask all day, and no matter what the answers are, they would still be correct?

7. What word in the dictionary is always spelled wrong?

8. A policeman saw a truck driver going the wrong way down a one-way street, but didn’t give him a ticket. Why not?

9. What goes around the world but stays in a corner? 

10. Three sailors fell overboard, but only one got his hair wet. What happened?

11. What does no man want, yet no man wants to lose?

12. You answer me, although I never ask you questions. What am I?

13. You heard me before, yet you hear me again. Then I die, ’til you call me again. What am I?

14. If a plane crashed on the border of England and Scotland, where would they bury the survivors?

15. Six children and two dogs were standing under an umbrella, but none of them got wet. How come?

16. A farmer had seventeen sheep, all but nine died, how many did he have left?

17. A man comes up to ask what time it is. What do you say?

18. How can you tell when a woman has bad taste?

19. There is an ancient invention still used in some parts of the world today that allows people to see through walls. What is it?

20. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?

Answers to riddles

1. It let out a little wine.

2. Tell her she is pregnant.

3. Because he was chicken.

4. Wet.

5. Only one, but the light bulb has to WANT to change.

6. What time is it?

7. Wrong.

8. The truck driver was walking.

9. A postage stamp 

10. The other two were bald.

11. Work.

12. The telephone.

13. An echo.

14. Survivors are alive.

15. It wasn’t raining

16. Nine.

17. Time to get a watch.

18. A cannibal takes one bite of her and then orders a salad.

19. A Window.

20. Elephino.

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